The girls at the ballroom would never believe me in a million years! If they could see me now
I′m eatin' fancy chow and drinkin′ fancy wine
I'd like those stumble bums
The kind of top-drawer, first-rate chums I attract
All I can say is "Wow-ee!"
If my friends could see me now!
They′d never believe it! They′d never believe it!
Traipsin' round this million dollar chicken coop
I′d hear those thrift shop cats say, "Brother get her!
Laid on a bedspread made from three kinds of fur!"
Wait till the riff and raff
What a build up, holy cow!
If my friends could see me now!
Who′s waitin' on me like he was a maitre′d
I hear my buddies sayin', "Crazy, what gives?
Tonight she's living like the other half lives!"
To think the highest brow
Should pick the lowest brow
Which there′s no doubt is me
What a step up, holy cow!